It’s not OK, it’s never OK

May 25, 2020March 30, 2025 / Brienna / Leave a comment

As promised, this is a proper post/review of Know My Name by Chanel Miller. This book is memoir detailing the aftermath of Chanel’s sexual assault, which took place in 2015 at Stanford University at a frat party.

I remember hearing about this when it happened. I remember being vaguely outraged upon hearing his sentencing – 6 months! However, prior to reading her book, I did not read her victim statement, or really know any details of the case. Just bits and pieces and enough to know it was unfair.

Chanel’s story breaks my heart. She was shoved into a legal system without having much explained to her. And while she won her case, the way her legal team handled it seemed weird to me. Maybe I watch too much on TV or in the movies to know what should really happen.

It’s not OK that this happened to her. It’s not OK that it took YEARS for her to get justice. It’s NOT OK that he got off with a sentence of 6 months and out on probation after serving only 3 months.

I hate that the media apparently focused on his lost potential as an Olympic swimmer. Hello, wake up! I don’t want someone like him representing my country at the Olympics! What about her life? Why does his matter more?

Why are the victims of sex crimes further victimized by our society? Why are we so quick to make excuses for the assholes that do these things? Where is the solidarity and compassion for the ones who suffer the most?

It seems like I have a lot of questions and not many answers. I’m sickened by how our society reacts, and it’s horrible what people have gone through, will go through, are going through for the rest of their lives. As a society, we should protect the victims, not the perps. Yes, innocent until proven guilty, but geez, stop saying things like “she was asking for it” or commenting on how a woman was dressed. That’s not OK, it does not make it OK. It’s irrelevant.

The one good part of the story is that the judge was recalled. Over a million people signed online petitions to get this on the ballot, and he was voted out.

How do we make the system better? What can we do as individuals? One simple thing is to support (by donating or volunteering) organizations like Joyful Heart Foundation. They have initiatives to end the backlog, and get rape kits processed. I’m sure there are many other worthy organizations, this is just one example.

We can also speak up if we are victims of sexual assault or harassment. It’s time to say it’s not OK, it’s never Ok. And, of course, show compassion and caring for those who need it.

I feel silly rating a book like this, who am I to rate her memoir, to put a number of stars next to her experience of sexual assault? All I can say is she told her story from the heart, she moved me with her words, she is an excellent writer, and I’m so sorry this happened to her.

Day 56 – Ordinary Hazards: A Novel

May 10, 2020March 30, 2025 / Brienna / Leave a comment

This book was so boring. Emma, our narrator, alternates between telling us real-time events happening in the small town dive bar, The Final Final, and showing us flashbacks of her life.

It appears to be a typical city-slicker moves to the country type of story. I wouldn’t know what it actually is because I only read the first third of the book. I kept waiting something, anything interesting, and in its absence, I quit reading.

I received a free copy of this novel from NetGalley.com in exchange for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own.

Day 50 (for real this time) – A Gentleman in Moscow

May 4, 2020March 30, 2025 / Brienna / Leave a comment

What a timely coincidence to read this book now. I believe my mom purchased it in early 2018, and since her Kindle library is shared with mine, I had access to it. However, I wasn’t really aware of it until I read Forward.

Forward is a collection of short stories curated by Blake Crouch. In the afterword, he highly recommends A Gentleman in Moscow. When I went to add it to my tbr list and purchase a copy, I discovered it was already on my Kindle! That’s always a nice surprise.

All of this happened back in January/February. I knew nothing about the plot, apart from the title. Since then, it’s come up in conversation a few times (or popped up online in some article or list of books to read), but I still didn’t know much about it.

I’m glad I didn’t know anything going in. Sometimes, the best way to ruin a book is to know too much beforehand. I like being surprised (most of the time). With that said, you can keep reading if you want with this warning — I’m going to talk, generally, about what this book is about. Hopefully, without spoilers.

Count Alexander Rostov is sentenced to house arrest, at the Metropol hotel in Moscow. It’s 1922, and the Bolsheviks are in charge. As a “Former Person”, he has to adjust his world to the confines of the hotel. Kicked out of his lavish suite and relegated to a 100 sq. ft room in the attic, this is quite the adjustment.

Rostov considers himself a man of purpose. He’s lived an adventurous and somewhat glamorous life up to this point. The novel tells the story of how he comes to terms with his new reality, and how his life unfolds within the confines of the Metropol over decades, while life continues to evolve and change outside.

For the times do, in fact, change. They change relentlessly. Inevitably. Inventively.

The backdrop of Russia, the Kremlin, and communism is central to the novel, but not the heart of the novel. The heart of the novel is Rostov, his transformation, his journey to understand what it means to be a man of purpose given circumstances not of his choosing.

…if a man does not master his circumstances then he is bound to be mastered by them.

Day 37 – A Boy and His Dog at the End of the World

April 21, 2020March 30, 2025 / Brienna / Leave a comment

A Boy and His Dog at the End of the World audiobook cover art

A Boy and His Dog at the End of the World by C.A. Fletcher

I recently finished listening to this book. A post-apocalyptic journey about — you guessed it — a boy and his dog. Gris, our main character and narrator, tells the story of his adventures by writing in a diary/journal. He says he’s writing this for “you”, a boy he found an ancient picture of, who looks exactly like him.

Without giving away too much of the plot, Gris lives in a world where technology is dead. Most of humanity is dead. Gris and his family live alone, on a small island. Gris has been told no one lives on the mainland (USA) anymore, every died and it’s not safe there. Something happened that made reproduction uncommon, and even the dogs rarely give birth.

When a strange man comes to trade with the family, Gris ends up going on a very unexpected adventure. What follows is a story about loyalty, hope, survival, and belief in yourself. In the end, no matter what kind of world we live in, always value kindness.

Right around the same time I started this book, I also came across a movie “A Boy and His Dog” which is also a post-apocalypse story about a boy and his dog. The movie was terrible and I turned it off. The book was quite enjoyable with a few interesting twists.

Don’t watch that movie, it sucked. The book, however, comes highly recommended by me!